Face it, we all love Phish. However, we all know a few individuals who simply don’t know when to say when. In honor of them, we have compiled a list of 23 signs you are listening to too much Phish.
23. You named your Cactus Mike
22. You skipped your father’s funeral so you could ride the rail during a mediocre 2.0 era performance.
21. You have spent hours on Google maps looking at the freeways in Los Angeles
20. You have looked into adopting a wombat
19. You have spent hours watching Justin Bieber videos on YouTube in hopes that Kanter sneaks in a Vultures tease.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owJXigU1VCQ&feature=youtu.be&t=13m38s
18. You signed up for Fantasy Football this year just so you could draft Russell Wilson
17. You spent an entire hour with your shrink working out your anger issues over the loss of the rumor section on Andy Gadiel’s Phish Page.
16. You convince yourself you have the power to officially ban people from Phish tour.
15. You cut off any car with a Phish sticker that you see in order to show off your stickers and that nifty Slave To The Traffic Light license plate frame
(Editor’s Note: We have never seen the above vehicle cut anyone off. We just think it’s a really cool picture)
14. You hold art conventions at crappy hotels in Atlantic City
13. You went to a Dick’s Sporting Goods store and bought a soccer ball. You never used it, instead it sits in the back of your trunk next to your jumper cables.
12. You go above and beyond the call of duty when taking care of your shoes
11. You skip important phone calls knowing that if you pause the LivePhish app, you will never make it through that Rock & Roll
10. You have started change.org petitions urging Subway to create a special French Toast Monte Cristo $5 footlong in honor of Page McConnell
(Note: You can sign our actual petition for this cause here.)
9. You weren’t disappointed with the Halloween cover set or thought it would be uncool to say you were.
8. You’ve slept with someone you met via twitter / “Twibe.”
7. You enjoy anonymously making fun of Antelope Greg
6. You have a playlist called “HeyScottyB’s favorite Harry Hoods of All-Time to be Learned and Memorized.”
5. You’ve met Trey. On purpose. Like you followed him.
4. Siri knows the difference between Phish and Fish
3. You enjoy telling fans of the The Hangover that Todd Phillips also directed a Phish documentary.
2. You capitalize the word “Lot.”
1. You only listen to Phish
Um, none of those signs are true for me personally. However, I’m pretty sure I listen to way too much Phish. Not that there’s a problem with that…
damn, didnt know trey was that much of a playa in number 5! What year was that and when did he get married, hah?
He’s been married since the 90s , and that pic is probably 2005
GYMFDS, Big Red!
Poor Sue
those are the wives/girlfriends of the members of UM… picture was taken as a joke.
#17 is spot on
Awwww too bad. I was gonna share this on surrender’s fb page until you made fun of Greg. The rest is pretty spot on but its never cool to make fun of other fans.
Technically, we made fun of ourselves. We also made fun of Phan Art, which I guess you take no offense to.
Teasing someone for throwing a community event in a crappy venue is a little different than talking about someone getting ass raped in jail. Sometimes you are pretty funny and this list is one of your best-evers, honestly, but shit like that just sets you back in the eyes of so many…
I agree… a lil harsh on celebrating Phish and pin/art community. This guy has obviously never layed his eyes on some “cream” pin work.
Well, we understand our humor is not for all. Thus the life of comedians. Glad you liked most of the list and we hope that you change your mind 🙂
antelope greg deserves to be assraped in jail
I have no problem with somebody who likes to repeatedly hit women getting a taste of their own medicine, in jail or otherwise.
Your defense of that asshat sets you back in the eyes of many as well.
It’s normally not cool to make fun of other fans, but it’s always cool to make fun of Antelope Greg.
Ha ha ha. Love the Antelope Greg one…..I know so many people that this fits it is not phunny.
How the FUCK did i not make it onto this list?
#24 – You start a whole clothing line based on the premise of tracking and documenting shows that you’ve been to…
Hilarious! And I’m not ashamed that I fit a few of these! If loving Phish is wrong, I don’t want to be right. Thanks for the laughs!
#24, No sense of humor about PHiSH jokes.
#5 (stickers and license plate frame)
LOL, that was my wife Kat’s Villager van. I still have the plates, “DVD SKY”.
BTW, that van died after being towed by a tractor a quarter mile through a parking lot with thigh deep mud at Coventry and a week later the tranny seizing up. There’s a moral to that fable somewhere. (The van also took us to Big Cypress and many other shows during the 1.0 and 2.0 years).
I thought that vehicle looked familiar. Kat’s virginal white Villager van!
Jack, I was pretty sure that was Kat’s van! Hahahaha. The NY plates made me even more certain.
Nice pix of Kat’s van! You should have something about “You worship ZZYZX for giving us cool stats”.
\m/
LMFAO! So, I guess checking more than half of these would constitute as a problem? I was told I may have an issue a few days ago by a friend, but I laughed him off. Wrong?????
#24: You started your own Phish facebook group.
admitting I have a problem is the first step..right? lmfao