In a similar fashion to Relix, we are sharing albums we feel Phish should cover in Atlantic City for Halloween 2013. Unlike Relix, our posts are not funny. Click here to read our case for Metallica’s debut album Kill ‘Em All.
Since 1994, Phish has covered six albums on Halloween night. The most recent release was 1980’s Remain in Light by Talking Heads. While Purple Rain by Prince, Kid A by Radiohead and Oracular Spectacular by MGMT all ended up as campgrounds for Festival 8, 2013 will be the year that Phish covers an album released long after Ronald Reagan took controls as puppet president of the United States of America.
While countless albums have been released since Remain in Light, there is one single album that is screaming for Phish to cover it. That album is Hot Fuss by The Killers. Released a few short days after Trey Anastasio broke Phish up, The Killers picked up the torch of ‘band most white people enjoy dancing awkwardly to’ at the exact same moment Page began to cry at Coventry.
Featuring five massive radio singles, Hot Fuss put the final nail in the coffin of the faux hippie trend that spread across America like wildfire during the 1990’s. With the nation involved in two wars, this was no time to be a hippie. Instead Hot Fuss turned the youth into faux hipsters decked out in v-neck shirts and cropped pants. You couldn’t walk into an oxygen bar in the middle part of last decade without hearing Mr. Brightside played at maximum volume. Without Hot Fuss knocking down the doors of acceptable music for douchebags in Von Dutch hats everywhere, Trey Anastasio would have never had a chance to work with Mates of States and The National on that last solo album we can’t even remember the name of.
Why They Might Do It: Little girls love The Killers. Since the various children of Phish won’t be able to Trick or Treat on Halloween night, the boys from Vermont will do everything they can to look cool in front of their kids. With Hot Fuss, they can do that, while not selling their souls by covering something as dreadful and uninspired as the guy whose Dad played Jason Seaver on Growing Pains. This is also a great chance to stretch “Somebody Told Me” into Tahoe “Tweezer” territory, because that’s something the world really needs in 2013. With Fish typically taking vocals during Halloween gigs, we feel “On Top” would be appropriate, because do you really think Jon is a bottom? Another added bonus is the fact The Killers only have four members and plenty of keyboards, so Page will actually have something to do besides eat sandwiches and watch re-runs of House.
Why They Probably Won’t Do It: The biggest challenge facing Phish in covering Hot Fuss is the structural integrity of Boardwalk Hall. With the thunderous bass line opening of the albums first song, “Jenny Was A Friend Of Mine”, we all know Mike Gordon could destroy the building before Anastasio gets the opportunity to flub lyrics about ‘fights on the promenade in the rain.’ Could you imagine checking the Phish From The Road Instagram feed to discover that the only survivor was Antelope Greg? Another problem with this album cover is the entire second half. With the first half of the album featuring all the hits, chances are phans would sneak out during the second half of the set in hopes of getting another round of beers before Phish returns to being the profitable 90’s nostalgia act that we have grown to love since that Barry guy from Illinois failed to deliver the Change he promised us.
One final thing going against Phish when it comes to covering the music of The Killers: not a single member of Phish on their best day will be as pretty as Brandon Flowers on his worst day.