December, 2011

  1. King Wilson: I Fucking Hate Glowsticks

    December 18, 2011 by TreyAntipasta

    King Wilson, the evil ruler of all of Prussia and Gamehendge, Duke of Lizards and general all around douche weighed in on issue of Glowsticks at Phish shows.

    “I Fucking Hate Glowsticks! Seriously, these things are the worst. I’m at a show, they play YEM and they go flying. I’m usually on the floor FOB near the rogue tapers and those god damn sticks come flying. It makes me so angry I want to punch a n00b, right in his fucking eye. Yeah, I’ve done that before too. Not proud of myself, but I did it!”

    Phish fans have recently discussed the merits of Glowsticks at shows, as a planned event to START the 12/28 show has garnered hundreds of attendees via the Facebook event page but at the same time has led to increased conversation among Phish fans as to the purpose of Glowsticks at shows. Some think they are cool, some think they are annoying, but with the support of King Wilson it is clear that the anti-Glowstick crowd has gained a major endorsement.

    “Anyone who agrees with me is cool. If you don’t like Glowsticks, we can hang before the show, eat some molly, rip lines, punch n00bs, whatever the fuck ya want. I roll heavy and don’t take shit from no one. We rage in ways that are unheard of yet.”

    Wilson continued, “You know Dave Anver? That guy is a fucking pussy compared to me!”

    Harping on his hatred of Glowsticks, he even continued to add credence to the rumor that dub-step DJ Skrillex is the product of improper Glowstick use. “I heard Skrillex ate a glowstick before he started producing that god awful shit fuck music he makes. Serves him right. Fuck him too.”

    It seems that fans of Glowsticks have their work cut out for them on 12/28, with a vocal opponent leading the fans who hate Glowsticks. ‘No i cant have fun!”

    “And if Phish plays anything less than a 8 minute Tube, shit is gonna get REAL!”


  2. Jeff Holdsworth totally loving life

    December 18, 2011 by TreyAntipasta

    For Phish fans who were wondering, Jeff Holdsworth is doing fine and totally loving life. Emerging from the relative obscurity of life as a computer engineer, Holdsworth sat down with Trey Antipasta from The Phunion to talk about what life is like, 25 years after leaving the band he founded, Phish.

    “I can’t complain, I have my family, my health. Plus I get to play in a jazz trio every Wednesday night downtown at a martini bar, although they sometimes turn my amp down.”

    When not working or playing guitar, Jeff has no remorse on leaving Phish, a band that went on to have huge national touring success. “Look, I get $50 every time they play Possum and $75 everytime they play Camel Walk. So in case you missed the last few tours, I’m doing very well thank you very much.”

    Added Holdsworth, “Finally gonna put a pool in. Aboveground.”

    Co-workers did not seem to be aware that Holdsworth was one of the founders of Phish. “He talks about it, but we figured he was just talking out his ass, about being in Phish. One day we looked it up and by god, there it is – Jeff playing with Trey. We had no idea.”

    When the interview resumed, Jeff showed a photo of Trey and him from 1985 photo at UVM. He then silently stared at the photo for 3 minutes, alternating between emotions – first smiling, then a tear, then a look of frustration before turning back to the interview.

    “Where were we? Oh right, well, I have my trio to look forward to each week and if fans were to stop down and check it out, that would be pretty sweet. And in case anyone else is reading, I ‘try’ to keep my calendar pretty open.”